Lord, put me outta my misery before I get to this stage …

Is this what happens to old forrinners?

Is this what happens to old forrinners?

This geezer rocks. He’s busting all kinds of rudeness. Hard to see exactly how dope that shirt is from this photo, but basically it’s a pink silk Chinese-style number. He’s obviously one of those sad lifers who reckons he’s semi-Taiwanese or something. Probably has shit-hot Chinese and knows all the most obscure and ridiculous customs but they still just call him a fat old loawei behind his back.

Then, he’s toppin it off with that hat, complete with string. The only thing that’s lacking is some Crocodile-Dundee-styley corks on strings, though he does have one string for a chinstrap – a real touch of class.

If you’re not feelin his stylo, there’s also the trainers. Clunky-ass pieces of crap, shoelaces untied, giving him even more a a caj look! Love the way he’s tapping away on that laptop.

Finally, and certainly not least, what the fuck is gannin on with his bag. It appears to be hooked up to a ketring in his computer, with a cord for the headphones coming from it … and that blue light?! Cyborg alert! You’d think these man-machines could turn themselves out a little more presentable, like, though.

Seriously, though, when I see these foreign oldsters, I fear for my sanity and know I have to get out of here eventually before I end up looking like this embarrassment!


MRT Passengers Need to Grow a Pair

Listen you fuckers, why doesn't one of you kick the shit out of me, eh?!

Listen you fuckers, why doesn’t one of you kick the shit out of me, eh?!

Out on the lash tonight … just staggered back and can’t be arsed to figure out howto embed the video from the news article below, so I’m just posting the link here.  It’s from the local news service United Daily News and shows some forriner going apeshit on the MRT. They’re claiming he is Czech but it certainly doesn’t sound like to me. Anyhoo, this fool is ranting and raving and no one does a damn thing. I was out with a Mexican and American pal tonight and they both said this guy would have copped a beating bigtime if he’d been trying to chuck it like this on public transport in their home countries. Actually, in the States, he’d probably have a cap popped in that ass, as the gangster rap types say. If he’d been spouting that shit in London, especially the given the way he was slagging the locals off, then I’m pretty sure he would’ve got battered, too. I do reckon he has some mental issues, but unfortunately that’s not going to stop you catching a clobberin. In fact, it might even invite an even quicker end to your ravings as people ain’t going to take the risk that you might start getting physical, to quote, er, Olivia Newton Jones, was it? That’s just the thing though … The geezer’s whole “point” (yeah, it’s hard to find one in the midst of all that mouth-frothing madness) seems to be that Taiwanese area spineless bunch who don’t stand up to aggression and conforntation of the very sort he is exhibiting. And, it’s an ironic kind of paradox that he sees to be right! The only fella who says shit to him seems to receive his congrats and hearty pat of the back before he launches into his rantings again to tell the others that “his friend” is the only one standing up to him. In a way, it’s a kind of fascinating point. “I’m going to act like an utter cunt to prove that you lot don’t stand up to utter cunts”, though I doubt he has actually had the clearvision to formulate a strategy in that way. Anyway, mental illness or not, someone definitely needed to slap some sense into him. People were saying all over Facebook and online media that he didn’t touch or even physically threaten anyone but that’s bollocks. He was getting all up in people’s faces and he was clearly actually touching one bloke near the end. The guy in question seems to only grow a pair of gonads once the staff, who I guess were alerted by someone on one of the intercoms, get on the carriage. He then appears to mutter some half-hearted stuff back at our headcase hero. As people have mentioned, this guy went at it for well past the amount of time that skinny little fuck had to kill four people on the MRT last year, so – sorry dude, if you’re just a general loon, or having a meltdown cos your cram school finally got tired of seeing your old miserable arse getting older and more miserable in front of tearful toddlers, and gave you the chop, but you get that aggro that close to me and you get tiger uppercutted the fuck out. Oh, and when I slammed that shit into GoogleTranslate, I saw the article referred to “Adoulah” which I know is a Taiwanese word for forriners that isn’t polite. I read somewhere that it came from Japanese as when they pointed at forriners, they would say “Look, a dog, ah!” Not sure if that’s true … also heard that it means “big nose”. Whetever, trust the local media to put these fucking discriminating words in their articles for no reason than to get a racist dig in. The geezer was a twat, not a “foreign twat”. I also saw people on the Taiwan News in English thread saying “Another forriner being out of order etc.” Why are they saying “ANOTHER” like this is what we expect from loa wai all the time  …? Seems some forriners have been here too long and go in for the tarring everyone with the same brush mentality that passes for insight into other cultures to Taiwanese. Self-loathing mo-fos.