Ring of Fire


Skip the two-a-penny crap in the background. This shit is Da Bomb!

I loves my shit hot, so when the boss of a local Chao Fan (fried rice) place saw me loading up with the lightweight salty red chilli sauce that you find in most places and not looking particularly impressed, he whipped this fucker out. Now my Yankish friends are always telling me how Canadians don’t do hot. I’ve always suspected that was bollocks as I have a couple of Canuck pals with a penchant for the fiery side of things.

The laoban (boss) had spent a bit of time in Vancouver (like, apparently, half of Taiwan) chasing after some bird and, when it went pear-shaped, he shuffled back to Formosa with nothing but this savagely hot sauce in his possession. He planted it and up sprung a fully-fledged fried rice shop.

Anyway, I had to give it a try as there were some local tuffs egging me on. Naturally, I maintained the habitual Brit stiff upper lip and tried my damnedest to ensure no tears came to my eyes. My composure (known in the trade as “styling it out”) ensured the locals were suitably impressed.

It was no mean feat as this was most certainly was among the hottest sauces I’ve ever come across and not actually particularly nice (not so much cos of the burn your sphincter off your arse power but more the stale, musty taste). Still, we only live once and “Da Bomb” should be sampled by any self-respecting capsicum freak!