Taiwan Baked Chicken

Just chillin ...

Just chillin …

Passing a local market bakery the other day, I did a double take when I saw a couple of dark bundles perched on the metal frame of one of the tables outside.

It took me a while to register exactly what they were but when one of them clucked, I finally realised.

“Why are there chickens roosting on your table?” I asked a young lady who was putting bread into the large oven nearby. She shrugged. “Where did those chickens come from?”  I tried. More shrugs, then eventually, reluctantly, “They’re someone else’s.”

Ah. There you go, then.




Another Reason I’m Not Going Back to the UK Anytime Soon


Now, it might seem like I moan about things here in Taiwan a bit. But FTNM is going on the record now to say: “It’s official! Taiwan is a great place to live!”

A survey from The Anti-Ma Ying-Jeou Express The Economist has good old Formosa at No.14 in the world rankings of best places to be born, ahead of the States (joint 16th with Germany) and my own dear Britain (a dismal and probably flattering 27th place).

I think I’ll stick around for at least another year …

Falun Dafa are Bigoted Nutters


Falun Dafa is good, signs around Taiwan proclaim. Trouble is, they’re not. They are, in fact, just another bunch of dangerously brainwashed fuckwits.

I realise these lot are persecuted to the max in China (you can see them outside the National Palace Museum handing shit out and meditating) but they are definitely loons with some unpleasant beliefs. If you’re in any doubt, check out some of their Dear Leader’s ‘teachings’ here.

Gay people are fucked, as are darkies and mixed race children. They’re all part of some alien plot to fuck up the world, you see. Doesn’t sound a whole lot different to these insanos.

We DEMAND our rights … to have people executed! NOW!

Kill em! Kill em all! Appeal? What? Just KILL!

Kill em! Kill em all! Appeal? What? Just KILL!

Whether you agree with capital punishment (personally I think anyone who does either doesn’t think too hard about it or has some level of mental issues), there is something grotesque about demanding it is implemented in the name of “human rights”.

I’m not talking actual victims of crimes here or their families but “civic groups” who spend the day outside the Ministry of Justice, waving banners and hollering for people to be killed. Wang Wei-chun, a vindictive old shrew with a blood-lust spokeswoman for Taiwan Children’s Rights demanded that death-row inmates be put to death, complaining that  the government “had not carried out a death sentence in 21 months.” (I want an execution goddamnit! What’s with this dilly-dallying?!) Wang said she would sit there overnight, continuing to bay for blood protest.

“What did you do today, auntie?”

“Oh, I went on a rally …”

“That’s great. To demand rights for underprivileged groups?”

“Well, yes, Shao Ming, you could look at it that way. We are demanding our rights to have people murdered by the state! It’s a fundamental human right, you know?”

One can only hope that when Wang and ilk call for “the death sentence to be carried out in all cases, they aren’t extending that to some bozo who got caught teefing from a 7-11, but with bloodthirsty old harridans like this, we can’t be sure.


University Addresses Concerns over “Concern” E-mail That Sparked Concerns

Students use offensive la

Students using language that “misinterpreted the justice and rationality of public speaking” recently …

The baldly stated thesis of this post:

The universities that are stopping students from “holding assemblies” let alone protesting are a fucking disgrace.

Taiwan constantly harps on about the “miracle” of its transition to democracy and hard-won rights but allows – nay – enforces regulations on students, preventing them even organising.

Turton has already gone over this sorry saga here. I don’t read Chinese but I’m going to stick my oar in and say this really is an embarrassing state of affairs. Having attended a university that is famous for its activist traditions, it sickens me to read this kind of shit.

Basically, much like the situation with trade unions, but far more disgraceful, many universities in Taiwan don’t allow any kind of student activism (it seems even student gatherings are banned by many unis). With some students agitating over the  deal to flush Taiwan’s press freedoms down the shitter  Next Media ownership furore,  the Ministry of Education apparently circulated some email telling unis to “show concern” over student activities.  .

A student body hit back, one of em called the Minister of Education Chiang Wei-ling a “hypocrite” and said he wasn’t fit for office and suddenly his university (Tsing Hua) is apologising to the guy and “to society” as a whole, and expressing its “profound heartache”  at the student’s “arbitrary conduct,” and base behaviour that “misinterpreted the justice and rationality of public speaking and ignored that people should show respect to each other during their interactions.”

This is what universities are for FFS! This really all pangs of PRC/fascist shit and shows exactly why the “concerns” (the only genuine ones in this shameful affair) of the students were bang on in the first place! Good luck to em.




Faking the Funk


Rip-off Van Winkle

Now FTNM can, and does, spend hours bemoaning the despicably selfish behaviour one encounters daily on the MRT but the ‘fake sleeping’ technique  pretty much takes the biscuit. I’ve seen it mentioned on other blogs in Taiwan and on the news and there is no doubt it is a widespread ruse.

This self-centred grotbag was blatantly pretending. I know because I saw her peep when an elderly woman got on, then quickly make out that she was in the middle of snoozing again. What’s more, the odious trollop half opened her eyes again at one stage and saw I was aiming my phone cam in her direction. However rather than protest at my snapping her fakery, so desperate was this fathead to cling to her hard-won priority seat, that she instantly closed her eyes once again. I had my camera on the snapping noise effect mode so that there would be absolutely no question that I was capturing her mean-spirited behaviour and you can probably see a faint smirk of embarrassment  on her face that makes it obvious that she is NOT anywhere near asleep.

The fucktard next to her is not much better – a youngster hogging up a priority seat, too. The fact is, if there’s any danger of you (genuinely) falling asleep, you shouldn’t be plonking your fat arse down in the seat (I must add, by the way, the idea that almost all locals have that you’re not allowed to sit in these seats FULL STOP is misguided and clearly not backed up by the rules plastered all over the carriages. Basically it allows people to feel justified in not giving up a normal light blue seat because they aren’t ‘priority’ … I may come back to this point in a later post as I think it deserves a fuller treatment).

Black and White Issue?


Was amazed to see this advertisement recently on an MRT platform. The blatant discrimination against dark-skinned people in Taiwan extends to advertising and its really rare to see black people in ads unless they are reinforcing some stereotype or other (NBA player, rapper, African tribesman etc.),

This image projects an image of black men that I don’t think I’ve ever come across in Taiwan – at least not in advertising . The company is also a Taiwanese brand. The thinking usually seems to be that people will be put off by “he ren” much in the way I’ve been told black teachers are rejected in Taiwan because they might “scare the kids.”

So fair play to these lot for bucking the trend. Maybe attitudes are slowly changing …